Honesty

Honesty.

I think I have to long been a dishonest man.

The words that roll of my liars tongue are hollow.

A mirror to the empty decay that rots away my insides.

So, maybe it is time to be a honest man.

The world around me seems so distant so far from me.

A window to the feelings of loss and desperation.

Now I think back to my sins and cry, a broken man.

The wait now is for absolution, but the gods are so far away.

A doorway to my regrets like an ocean of abysmal despair.

So, maybe it is time to profess, I am a broken man.

The water I stare into mocks the failure in my eyes.

A deep blue storm of failure and dishonesty.

I think though, I have been too long a bad man.

The wash out of infinite failure bemoans my infinite sorrows.

A bed without you, but at least there is some wine left in that bottle.

So, with that warm red liquid dancing on my tongue.

The wine is a bargain, I sell my health and sanity for strength.

A red wave that allows me to beg for a moments pardon as the tears fall.

I think that I don't have the strength to go on.

The joke is that I tried to take my life again.

A force outside of me resuscitated me at the hospital.

So, if I am to be an honest man I must confess.

Waking up there broke me more than ever.

Those well meaning people who saved my life only prolonged my suffering.

And your fears are well founded Vince,

You are most likely to lose me to this world that I hate so much.

Because I don't have the strength everyday to stop the pain.